sonnestrahlen

................................i would be flying a few inches away from the ground having myself kicked, tossed and and n n .......But, here sit in some lonely

isolated place under the sweet moonlight, mosquites buzzing all over, and some sweet voices far away, the some insects making their sounds and all i long for

are some lonely peaceful moments, hoping no body spots here.

Another few more minutes i wud have completed a 20 yrs of my life span, [technical it's 12 more hours away from now].

20 yrs is quite a long time, for me with some faded memories dating back to my lowerkindergarden days and lots and loads of them from the years of my life that changed me, completely. I don't know how meaningful my life had become in these years.

But certain things have changed in me over these 2 years of my graduation, I changed, realised fliped over again and again. There always have been two sides of speaking at the same time. The choices i made, i decisions i took, things i did, changed me, made me learn, learn a lot a LOT, and the people i met here.....people i love...now mean much more than anything in my life.

Ever since my childhood, life meant nothing to me, all i knew was to go to school, listen to the teacher come back, play play n play....n rarely used to complete the homework, tht too when my mom used to push me around to complete it. Entering into junior school, life changed a bit had more to read. Being in Calcutta fr an year was a different time for me. I had no friends, really no friends, not even a single one, who said a 'Hi' to me, atleast once a day. Used to go to school at 5 in the morning, was back home usually by 9. :D. Spent the rest of the day hanging onto the grill in the verandah, starting at the vehciles and people passing by. Went for walks in the evenings, wih mom. Spent the weekends shopping or going around on our lille scooter.

Later moved to "Navi Mumbai", and so a new school and had a new set of friends and also a few enemies from the Marathi Medium of the same school. As usual went to school, listened to the teacher. And the interesting part being the noon, when our school closed and the Marathi Medium school began. We picked up fights jus fr the heck of it, and to prove that the English Medium's always better than their's. By the time we got into serious fights, i changed the school. The new school - J.H.Ambani was intially in bunglows, and was later moved to big complex. Had the best times of my life, the teachers being the best, i ever learnt from. A few liked me, a few had an idea that,i too was one among the useless crappy guys in the class. Well, my progress cards always told tht.

I always had an unique reason for not performing well in the exams, which was unique only to me. After 2 years, was pushed into a girl dominated section, where i was the only fortunate guy, but my ego lasted only for a few months, after which i was forced to have a girl benchmate. Thats because i was always thrown out our science class for laughing and nt concentrating , even though i somehow managed to answer whtever i was questioned on. Evenings i cycled around the town lived in, played some gully cricket or raced down the Expressway [ya, the present Mumbai-Pune Expressway], fortunate enough, for never i had any brusied elbows or knees. The 'coz of the 'Ranger Swing' i owned those days...:D...... 8th class was quite a hectic year, where fortunately/unfortunately we had to appear fr DAV public board exams.

In the months in between, it was decided that i would be sent to Andhra for my high school, thats because i had to have the nativity of Andhra, to be eligible to get into the REC's - the AP quota in them.

Soon, my golden days ended, had to leave behind all my frnds and crushes ;) and all the stupid and grt ppl. i ever met.

Soon the summer came and went, and in June, 2000 i was in a ICSE affliated school in a small town, Machilipatnam. Well, i was the guy from "Bomaby", which made people stare at me, the moment i steped into the class. a few weeks down the line, i got adjusted, dropped my English tounge and started off with the telugu slang. The teacher's were surprised with the pace i picked up telugu. The english i happened to drop at tht point of time, i was never able to get back to it again.

Here i saw people, like vampires hungry for blood. I tried to be a cool dude, but was pushed and forced into the system, and it was then i started studying, the typical way of mugging. Though was never good, at it. Somehow managed myself for the 2 years. The last few months of the 10th class i was down with jaundice, loosing around 20kgs in jus a week, and was down for around 2-3 months. By, the time i was back in school, i had to appear for pre-finals, there i shot up, being the first in the class and the 2nd being too far frm me, and the entire school(atleast some 4-5 classes down in the line) was shocked. Last time i shocked the entire school, was back in Ambani in 8th class, when i happened to score 2/100 in Sanskrit in the half yearly exams. And the teacher that time had no words fr me, i knew that 2 marks were on my answer sheet jus fr the heck of it.

Somehow managed to get some good marks on my gradesheet in the 10th. But, the teachers and ma parents were of opinion, i could have scored better. Ah, thats always the case.



And then came the residential school, me had fun, while most of the people, who had studied there complain of them. There i got used to get beaten up nearly everyday by the warden for sleeping, chatting, laughing in the study hours, where i was supposed to study, rather say mug up the text books. This happened for the first half of the year, for the another half, i picked up fights wid the warden who alleged me of LOOKING at the girls in the other section. While, it took me nearly a month to realise what actually he was accusing me of. Spent most of the day either sleeping or playing some stupid paper games.

IIT didn't interest me much, so i jus slogged in the campus, pratically doing nothin, while ma best frnd was busy with the IIT preps, i decided not to disturb him. While some others hoverd around him, being jealous of we being the best frnds....So, mostly used to spend time, my way.

Second year, i moved to the elite campus. :D, the second best set of ppl. after those who prepared fr IIT. But, factually, I again, never used to study the way i should i have being. But, always ended up asking the campus in-charge for our quota of bi-weekly movies that were supposed to be screened.

The in the end before i was to write the entrance exams, i started preparing seriously, it was jus some 3 odd months of effort i had put into the preparation. the rest of 2 years i spent, i jus slogged n gt bored and bored ppl. around me... :D


Somehow i managed to score 903/1000 marks in the 11th and 12th public exams, this score is way tooooo LOW. and the state engg. entrance gt some 1800 odd rank in the state. and finally aieee gt some 5700 odd rank. well, again my parents n all my relatives told me i could have done better. Ya, fr aieee i could have, if that damned examination center had driking water and the facility of toilets.

Wasn't fortunate enough to get into a decent enough REC, but was fortunate to get into the place where i am now. Is atleast worth the 3 months of effort i had put in.


2 years, here, and here i am changed completely from wht i was jus 2 years ago....n frm wht i was a few more year down the line, tht wasn't me then.

wht i am now, is wht i am....................